mix

I am not sure what this feeling translate to.. but it is a mixture of feelings.. of confusion and disappointment.

in myself.

I hv completed my manual and is going to submit it on tuesday. This manual is 11+k words long.. and about 75 pages. Although i know i hv tried to do it as extensive and step-by step as it can be, somehow, i just know that it isnt a good job. I wanted to include a chart- which i didnt do it in the ned, i wanted to have a more detailed plan- but think i hv i obmitted some details.. want this want that want this want that. full of plans for my manual..

I think i hv covered most if not all of the main points given by the lecturer.. yet i feel that i could hv answer them in a more detailed manner. For instance- justification of assessment used, i chose the CBCL (child behavior checklist- just to check for cormorbid disorders) but i left out WHY i hv chosen to use that..except to mention it briefly (like 1 sentence) abt it.

I guess i am trying to remind myself that i hv all those assignments n clients to look at.. that even though i know this isnt a fantastic job, it is the best i cld do with the amount of time i hv left to do it! Yet, i am left with the feeling of.. 'this is not what i can do.. i can do better than this'. It feels crap knowing that u can do better than this.. but u have not done it.

I'm ruminating.. of where i hv gone wrong. even BEFORE i hand up the assignment. Thank GOD i asked armand to hide the binded assignment for me... can u imagine me going through it and picking through everything again?

Cant do that. I have to move on to other assignments!