Monday, June 27, 2005

my weekend

my stomach hasnt been good lately. Bouts of gastric and just general discomfort, *scolding tummy*.

The weekend has been pretty indulgent. I slept till late on saturday morning..and BOY do i enjoy it. It feels great to sleep...and sleep..and sleep.... yeah, i hv this clinic diary due this friday, and everything needs organising at the moment.

Anyone keen to sponsor me a filing cabinet (throw in someone to help me put the documents in the files as well?)

oh yes, i was on the topic of my weekend. I had a fantastic dinner on friday night... lovely place, lovely walk (nice catching up with u), wonderful morning on saturday... pretty much one of the most relaxing weekends i had in months. In fact, I relaxed so much that i dont want the week to begin again.. *staring sadly at the pile of papers behind me* I still smiled when i think of this weekend... i didnt do anything much with regards to uni work (prob ome of the first weekends like that).. it's bad of me i know.. i shldnt.. but.. ...... ....

It suxs of course, having something due at the back of your mind.. and u cant help it when your work drift into your conversations or even your mind.. *this is just a random thought* (see!)

If you ask me, i think this year is pretty much the most challenging year i ever had (i did my honours last year right? i cant seem to remember most of it... maybe it was that traumatic that my memory is trying to repress it). Then again, ask me next year and i will prob say that will be the most challenging year.

On the other hand, i dont think i have ever been this happy before. Not in my undergrad years... no.. never. I feel free, cared for, loved (how can i not? with u ppl praying, sending me smses, emails, phone calls..) and most of all just joyful.

Perhaps is the combi of things happening. No, i dont feel that i am right on the top at my studies but at least i know i am doing something i like. I still feel insecure as a therapist but enjoyed all the challenges so far (translating the WAIS III in mandarin prob top off my list AND being in a case meeting with 8 other different ppl and 1 pissed off teacher). I still have the blank look during supervision and walk around feeling like i forgot something....

I feel that i smiled more, laughed more.. I am able to look at my mistakes and laugh. I look forward to end of the day where i can go home and know that my day had been fruitful (and more work awaiting at home for me..ew). Generally, just more peaceful. Trying to predicit things happening, being a control freak is still part of me but it lessen slightly (i think?). I can walk into a session expecting everything and anything, i can look at dramas and tantrums of life, even at home in a calmer outlook BUT i cant survive the semester if i dont control my work.... (u win some u lose some).

I still hit my head on the bed frame, my elbow on the wall, cut my finger when i peel potatoes and even knock my knees when i walk. I guess i grew up in some areas but retained others.. :p

the weekend is almost over. I dont want it to be over... I feel old now, in a old hangup world where weekends are always looked forward to and weekdays just never seem to end.

No comments:

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...